Just stop being surprised. It happens all the time. It’s a daily occurrence. It is one of the most ordinary experiences of the daily life of women. Even gay men are guilty of gender stereotyping women.
Here’s the thing few men are willing to accept, believe, or even hear from us women.
We expect men to assault us, harass us, molest us. We grow up being taught that you men will mistreat us. We receive all sorts of messages about how we might minimize our chances of abuse, but the fact remains that we are pretty much unable to prevent it because it is the choice of men to do it. We women can’t control the choices a man makes.
Something that seems to be deeply ingrained in the mentality of even the best of men is that we women are at men’s disposal to use however a man would. We are objects, playthings, possessions, things. That is how most men perceive us.
In order to function among men, we women act as if this isn’t true. We women hope for the best.
It’s much worse, of course, in any culture, religion, or society in which patriarchy is considered a positive. I can’t begin to account for the number of discussions about the “Biblical view of womanhood” which says women are second-class citizens. I grew up Roman Catholic and women are second-class citizens there too.
While the Hebrew Scriptures are full of stories about patriarchy, there are any number of hints, and one has to search for them, that Judaism is an egalitarian religion. One of the main hints is Proverbs 31.
Then there is St. Paul whose teaching about men and women is based on the fact that Jesus destroyed all the perceived differences between men and women. In fact, Jesus destroyed all the perceived differences between all human beings. Galatians 3:28 says “There is no longer Jew or Gentile, slave or free, male and female. For you are all one in Christ Jesus. ”
So, no, we should not be surprised that men are accused of abusing women. However, we women are no longer going to allow you men to get away with it. And if you men claim to know Jesus, we expect you to get remedial treatment so you start thinking of us human beings, not merely receptacles for your sexual desires.